There's a whale in London. In the River Thames. If you go to the BBC's web site you can watch live coverage of a bit of grey blubber amidst the greenish choppy water. Woo.
Someone from the Marine Connection (a whale and dolphin protection charity), said "The last thing we want to do is stress the animal out."
What are the chances of that happening, then? Its already got it's own web coverage, a host of boats carrying pursuing 'concerned' whale conservation people, as well as the rest of the media too bored or tipsy on a Friday afternoon to cover any serious news - and I just betcha that someone, somewhere in our capital is busy making up some crappy t-shirts for the tourists.
Meanwhile in Fangworld, Mr Fang has badly broken and dislocated his little toe, and is trying to out-crip me with his cries of pain, general limping, and requests for painkillers. To his credit, he's gone into work today because they are busy, but has been signed off for two weeks and will be competing with me for the sofa and the telly remote until the end of the month.
I might have known this was coming ever since he got pissed on Christmas Day and took himself off to the kitchen (leaving me with my parents and Grandpa in the living room watching 'Singin' In The Rain, at top volume since Grandpa's hearing aids were faulty...) to try and do wheelies in my wheelchair.
Looks like the game's up. Take me to the river.